One of my best friends Victoria Beckham called me up at the patisserie I was staying at and asked me if I fancied a spot of shopping. Vikki and I are known in our circle as the 'Two Vikkis' as we spend so much time together. We are like two peas in a pod. Although I would'nt say this to her face I am actually the better looking of the two of us, sometimes she has a tendency to veer towards the Vikki Pollardesque.
Anyway we shimmied on down to Harvey Nicks to try on an outfit or 50. We bought a few sexy leather numbers in Dolce and Gabanna. I looked so sexy in one outfit I thought i could actually eat myself. Then we went on to Robert Cavalli, Victoria and I tried on the most beautiful dresses. One particular dress I tried on clung to my curves so much I simply oozed cream everywhere. Victoria had to get on the floor and lick it all up. Ahh she really is a true friend.
After a hard days shopping we went up to the fifth floor bar for a drink. Victoria had arranged to meet David up there.
After a few drinks we were all having a good chat and getting a bit merry when David starting playing footsy with my jam filling under the table. Then he began openly flirting with me in front of Victoria. I just did'nt know what to do. As you well know in my previous blog I have experienced what its like for someone to blatantly flirt with your partner in front of you. Its not very nice.
I did'nt want Victoria to be embarassed or hurt any longer after all she has been through these last couple of years. So what I did was, I discreetly went to the ladies room and sent David a text saying 'Meet me at the Sanderson in 2 hours I'm Raw and I'm going to eat you alive.'
I then returned to the table and gave David a wink. I smiled smugly as I thought how I had saved the day, David was happy, I was exceedingly happy and Victoria's feelings had been saved. Everyones a winner.
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